Reject Average
On living a life less settled
A few weeks ago, my husband went to a conference and came back all fired up and energized. Connecting with people and learning had sparked several new approaches to his work, and he was eager to jump in and apply them. The mantra at the center of the conference was “Reject Average.” He even came home with a t-shirt emblazoned with the phrase. The funny thing is, my husband is not particularly competitive. He wants to do well, but is very far from cut-throat. If anything, he tends to be very self-deprecating.
Yet, as the weeks have passed, occasionally “Reject Average” pops up as a little quip in our conversations along with a lot of philosophizing about “What is average?” and “Why do we accept it?” Looking at average from a strictly mathematical perspective, it is the value that is most central or typical. But socially, it conjures a slightly different definition. Most people view “average” as ordinary or run-of-the-mill. And, depending on the context, it carries a slightly negative connotation. (I do see the irony here in citing “most people.”) The flip side of that statement is that average is simply a human norm.
Regardless of which (or both) of these unofficial definitions you might choose, the question remains, “Why would you want to ‘reject average’?” The world has a complicated relationship with wanting something original and disapproving of anything too far outside any norm. Humanity has a storied history of not appreciating artists, authors, scientists, entrepreneurs, leaders, etc., in their time. But there is an equally robust track record of people’s work being touted as groundbreaking, historic, and revolutionary. And some, like Keats in his quest to write the perfect poem or Hemingway in his quest to write the perfect sentence, equate the idea of exceptionalism with immortality.
So, where does that leave us with rejecting average? I wish I could tell you we’ve resolved that philosophical dilemma in our chats. But we haven’t. I would say, however, that a few tenets have risen to the top.
Be authentic.
Authenticity is a word that is thrown around a lot – almost ad nauseam. “Be authentic” and “Be yourself” are phrases so commonly heard that they are the very essence of average. But I suppose there is a reason for that. Authenticity seems to be a difficult concept for us humans to grasp. W.H. Auden wrote, “Some writers confuse authenticity, which they ought always to aim at, with originality, which they should never bother about.” So perhaps rejecting average is less about being original and more about listening to your inner voice, being honest, and not succumbing to pretense. In essence, being genuine.
Be your best self.
But can you separate authenticity from uniqueness? No two humans are 100% the same, even identical twins. Each person is a singular combination of their physical and spiritual existence, shaped by their time and circumstances on Earth. Maya Angelou is famously quoted as saying, “Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.” So perhaps rejecting average is really the act of striving – striving to be your best self. Live your best life.
Be interested, and you will be interesting.
While being your “genuine best self” and striving to live a purposeful life is a noble and worthy pursuit, we must still exist in the world around us. And that world is ever changing. Perhaps one of the most enduring children’s literature characters of all time, Anne of Green Gables, puts it best:
Anne is the very essence of “Rejecting Average.” She lives life genuinely, striving to be her best while fully present in the world.
My husband and I have not settled the “Reject Average” conundrum. But maybe it isn’t meant to be settled. Maybe in remaining unsettled, it is meant to be lived.
Thank you for taking a few minutes of your time and for reading my words. 🦋
Do you have thoughts on “rejecting average”? I’d LOVE to hear from you in the comments!
ⓒ Angie Gascho 2026. All rights reserved.
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“I have an average life. I don’t have stories to tell!” - that’s one of the most common replies in my storytelling workshops. People believe they ought to have ‘remarkable’ lives to tell memorable stories. What they miss is that noting the extraordinary in ordinary is the true gift of storytelling.
What a lovely read…
I felt much happier once I gave up trying to be like everyone else and do what was expected of me.